Not too long ago in the grand scheme of things, I lived with the most beautiful woman, so loving and caring that I loved her above all else. I loved her but never cared for her. I was just too naive and ignorant to know how to love her the way she loved me. I was too young.
She tried to teach me but circumstances would make it difficult and I would falter, yet she continued. For years we were together and for years she didn’t give up on me. After I had enough lessons she let me leave, so I left.
We split up and as time moved on I would try to love others the way she loved me but I couldn’t because my heart was not as unconditional and patient as hers. My heart was not as understanding.
As I grew older and further from her I would dwell on what she meant to me. Experience is what I lacked and what I would gain. Years would pass before I would suddenly understand all that she tried to teach me. Love myself and be patient with myself first. Love and patience come from me. Finally, I am the love and patience that I seek.
I don’t wish I could go back and change things. I don’t wish I could go back and tell her how I feel. I don’t wish that we were still together. I just hope.
I hope that in my older age that I’ve been a good son to her. I hope I’ve made her proud. My mom is the best woman I’ve ever known. The unconditional love, patience, and understanding that she has given has made me what I am today.
Thank you, mom. I love you.